The fight for LGBTQ rights is the civil rights movement of our generation. I have been wanting to write about this for a while and President Obama has given me the gentle nudge I needed. I am very grateful that he came forward to support gay marriage...I wish his motives seemed my pure and less politically calculating but nonetheless I am excited. For the first time more Americans are for marriage equality than against it. Millennials, born 1981 or later (I barely squeaked in ), are 63% in favor. For more poll information check out these Pew Forum results.

It is not surprising this is happening. As Martin Luther King Jr famously said, "Let us realize the arc of the moral universe is long but it bends toward justice." It seems like in our interconnected, social experience everyone knows someone that is gay. And typically when you come to know someone a realization occurs that they are not a mysterious, frightening, foreign other but rather a human being just like us. Homosexuals are associated less and less with flamboyant pride parades like this one in Miami (which I have no problem with but can create the scary "other") and more and more with Cameron and Mitchell from Modern Family. 

LGBT teenagers are of the highest risk for suicide. A recent event in my home state of Utah (which has the 12th highest rate of youth suicide in the US) garnered national attention for this very problem. And it is a problem. Imagine feeling like an outsider who doesn't fit in (not hard to do if you've ever been a teenager), who perpetually wants to be like everyone else...yet for whatever reason you cannot. You constantly hear words like "queer, gay, and faggot" at your school, online, even at your church. Those words may not even be directed at you yet they are always used negatively. They are used synonymously for stupid, lame, not good, "girly," and much worse. To describe what you are. You may even try to change who you are. Read your scriptures, fast, pray, be really good, maybe even look at pictures of naked girls...trying desperately to change. But nothing works.

Can you ask your friends for help? Those 13, 14, 15 year old friends who mock one another for anything unmanly as being queer? What would they think, would they actually help or think you were joking or maybe even that you wanted to be their boyfriend...gross!? Maybe not the best avenue to explore. Maybe Church is a good place to go for help. The place where you learn to love your neighbor as Jesus did and that you are a special child of God. Yet isn't that the same place where you have heard that being gay is an "abomination" and a "whoredom," scary words. On second thought maybe not. What about your family, your loving mom and dad who want so much for you to be happy. Will they embrace when you tell them, still love and accept you for who you are or can you more imagine your mom's confused look and your dad's disappointing eyes?

It is not hard to see why this is such a difficult issue for an adolescent or an individual of any age. We need to reach out with compassion and love to those that are suffering, those that feel "different," for whatever reason and say "Hey you know what, you are a loved child of god and my sister or brother...exactly the way you are."

Next post I am going to continue with LGBT issues looking more specifically at the interplay between religion and sexual orientation.   So on that note I'll close with how the amazing follower of Jesus, Shane Claiborne, came to his stance of homosexuality:

"I had all these ideas about homosexuality and civil union and gay marriage when I was in high school, and then I met a kid who was attracted to other men and he told me that he felt God had made a mistake when He made him and that he wanted to kill himself. If that brother can’t find a home in the Church, then I wonder who have we become. So for me, that’s a starting point—we need to attract the people Jesus attracted, and Jesus attracted the broken, the confused, the hurting, the abused. The people who walked away angry at Jesus, the people Jesus called a brood of vipers, the people Jesus ticked off—they were the self-righteous, the arrogant, the pretentious, the teachers of the law."

Till next time give some love to someone different than yourself. (o:
As always please comment, question, and discuss below.

I attended a wonderful Sunday service today all about mothers that really left me feeling grateful and inspired. Many of my ideas for this post are borrowed from the words heard at church.

To begin with I would be totally remiss not to give a shout out to my own mother. Mary has a crown of strawberry blonde hair, is an elementary school teacher, person of service, fabulous neighbor, concerned citizen, great friend, trendy, amazing example, and among many other wonderful things my loving mom. She loves her children unconditionally which is especially powerful when she disagrees with their ideas and actions yet loves on just the same. She is self sacrificing and selfless taking upon herself the pains, concerns and suffering of others and delighting in their successes and joys...yet at the same time she does not lose her self and is always growing and improving as a human being. I love my mom. (o:

I think most of us have a soft spot for our mothers. Walking down the aisles of any store one will notice card after card by hallmark and other companies that aim to help us express our feelings toward the women in our lives to whom we owe so much. Humor, sentimental, grandmothers, bathroom, cartoon, diapers, floral, realistic, nature, gift card holders, Peanuts, and various other themes and topics are used to tell Mom "hey thanks" in a way that resonates with their interests, experience and personalities.
However there are moms out there for whom you will not find a card. You will not find a card for those that have longed, prayed & fasted, tried different diets and hormones, put on a good optimistic face yet still cannot conceive. There is no card for those that recently miscarried and a Sunday in May brings no comfort. No card is available for young moms that choose to carry a child nine months and give it up for adoption. A card isn't available for childless, single amazing aunts. There are no cards that quite express what it is like for a lesbian couple comprised of two loving moms but only one has the legal custodial rights of a parent. Cards are not given to "community moms" who make lives better with their light and love despite having any blood relatives. Many mothers have outlived there children or lost relationships through family conflict or alienation...no cards are sent. To all these women, old and young, happy mother's day. Thank you for all the love and goodness you bring into the world.

I have a favorite Buddhist meditation that draws heavily upon the love we have for and the love we have received from our mothers. It can help develop love and compassion for all. A great mother's day activity. (o: Buddhists believe in reincarnation, the idea that we have all lived before in some form as a living creature (not necessarily human) countless times..of course it is not necessary to believe in for this to be efficacious, just some good ol' empathy and visualization. 
A good starting place is to sit comfortably close your eyes picture your own Mother (if you have a positive relationship, or you can use another caring adult/mentor) and her feelings of love and wishes for your happiness. Imagine her distress when learning of your struggles or pains. Really soak in those feelings and think of the feelings you reciprocate back to her. Now you can picture someone else and imagine them at one point being your mother (works even if male, you can visualize as father if easier). Think of the love and gratitude you had for them, for the compassion and concern they once had for you. Really you can picture that they have someone in this life that they have that amazing kindness and concern for. Maybe they are someone's loving mom/dad, someone's beloved child or spouse sharing in the human experience of love, connection and concern. Of course there are many variations of this and I encourage you to try it out to find motherly love for all...All living beings are my mother.

Motherly love is prevalent throughout religious belief despite minimal scriptural tales of women and mothers. Of course there are few fabulous stand outs like Eve, Sarah, and Mary. Within the LDS church there is a belief in a Heavenly Father and a Heavenly Mother who look down on us, love us and are concerned with our welfare. This idea really resonates with my heart. God is often portrayed as a strong, loving, jealous, angry, merciful and always male figure. God as mother is powerful and unique. A source of creation and intimate unconditional love. May we all have a wonderful Mother's Day and reach out to that inner divinity inside each us that longs for the happiness and success of others more than ourselves...as our Mothers have done for us.